Clemenza's Ratings Key:

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5.0 = A Drop of Bliss: A film so good it makes you don a bee outfit (with stinger), take to the streets and dance in front of strangers like the little girl in that Blind Melon video.

4.0-4.9 = Touchdown!: A film that "scores" on all fronts and makes you say "Sweet" more than three times.

3.0-3.9 = Close, but no Cheeseburger: A film that fails to deliver all the goods, but still entertains.

2.0-2.9 = Box of Rocks: A film that suckers you into "opening the box" and then disappoints you with what's inside.

1.1-1.9 = Time Bandit: A film so bad it makes you realize how precious every second is, and that you've just been robbed of a couple of hours you'll never, ever, get back.

0.0-1.0 = Soul Scarring: Makes one question the very meaning of his or her existence on this terrestrial orb hurtling blindly through the fathomless, uncaring universe.